I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
I wish i was in the wii world.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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