I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Randomize
