Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
