well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
