Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Randomize
