How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
We named our party play list daddy issues
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
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