bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
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