just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
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