If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
