Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
