Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Randomize
