so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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