The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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