I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Randomize
