Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
