I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Randomize
