just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
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