Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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