That's intense
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
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