Don't you send me to vm
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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