Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Can I color on your dick again?
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
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