Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
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