You don't have asthma, your pregnant
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
My day in three words: secret purse cake
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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