i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize