My nipple is on Facebook.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Randomize
