There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
True college students do jello shots in the library
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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