google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize
