Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
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