I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
