I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
So much rum. So many feels.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
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