I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
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