But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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