I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
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