Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
Randomize