I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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