I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Randomize
