I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
