Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Randomize
