Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
being pregnant is like rehab
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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