Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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