Can i not drive my cunt home
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
Randomize