I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Boobs speak an international language.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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