My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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