this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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