She said her name was "party"
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
