I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Randomize
