May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
