Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Randomize
