i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
jump out the window naked night went bad
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