Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
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