Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
My vagina just clenched in fear
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize
