i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
